The Annual Burping Contest

So just last week I went to a pre-eminent event
A day that both enthralled and energized:
The Annual Burping Contest, of celebrated fame.
And there, I was bemused and, well, surprised.

As well as the most crucial contest called “The Biggest Burp,”
Some judges also worked to classify
The dulcet sounds each belcher made: each rumble and each chirp,
Each soulful sound and roaring battle-cry.

Some burpers came from near and far to have their belches’ smells
Appraised for fragrance: floral, fruity, sweet.
According to the story that one ancient judge retells,
His favourite burp smelled just like stinky feet.

And I would be remiss to not acknowledge at this time,
The contest that I felt most vastly grand.
Requiring teamwork, harmony, and belches quite sublime:
The contest that announced the “Best Burp Band.”

So if, this time next year, you find yourself in need of awe,
You want to be enamoured by hot air,
You must attend this contest, smell smells and hear the roar.
It’s quite the spectacle. I’ll see you there.


Image adapted from originals © 2016 by lineartestpilot/

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