I went on a lovely vacation
But found it a troublesome chore.
I wanted a sunny location
And scenery I could adore.
I booked at a quaint little lodging
Securing a room and a bed,
But found myself needlessly dodging
The owner’s harassment instead.
Of course, he was lovely at check-in:
He passed me my keys with a smile.
“Please make this your home,” he had beckoned;
“We hope you will stay for a while.”
Despite the man’s warm salutation
And offer to let down my guard,
Enjoying the accommodation
Became very taxing and hard.
Now when I am home I will daily
Spend time strolling ‘round in the nude.
But though I’d been welcomed so gaily,
I then got called vulgar and rude!
And though when I’m home I let dishes
Pile up and then cultivate mold,
This countered the owner man’s wishes—
Or so I was boorishly told.
So though I had high expectations
And though I had come from afar
For these modest accommodations
I leave just one desolate star.